Marriage counseling is helpful when your relationship is in trouble, but many couples find it invaluable as they head toward a major life transition. Looking forward to the birth of your first child? Is the empty nest around the corner? Wondering about life together in retirement? Life transitions are predictable periods of vulnerability in a marriage…Read more
Beautiful in the broken places
The Japanese art of kintsugi offers a lovely metaphor for human growth and relationship repair. Broken pottery is repaired with gold-dusted lacquer, creating gold seams in place of the original cracks. The resulting piece is more beautiful than the original. Kintsugi (“joined with gold”) may have originated in the late 14th century when shogun Ashikaga…Read more
“I’m Not In Love With You Anymore”
Just heard these words from your partner? Feeling this way yourself? Either way, it’s a pivotal moment. Whether you’re scared, or sad, or resigned, know that even though it feels like doom for your relationship, this sentence offers you the opportunity to breathe new life into it. Falling out of love doesn’t need to be a…Read more
Arguing laundry or politics? Turn conflict into opportunity
This week I did a segment on the National Public Radio program To the Point, “One Year Later: Is Political Polarization Affecting Your Family?“ on KCRW in Los Angeles. It’s not easy for any of us to believe that conflict can be a positive, especially family conflict about the current administration. Even if you don’t describe…Read more
Romance gone?
With your sex life at low ebb it’s tempting to assume that a) your partner no longer finds you attractive or b) it’s your marital manifest destiny to have the chemistry fizzle out. No denying that the love life of a married couple is different from that of a single, but different doesn’t mean worse.…Read more
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